Tuesday I had a new program installed. No, not on my computer, in my body. I have been contemplating this decision for a few years really. Any one who has struggled with their weight probably considers weight loss surgery at some point or another.

I kept telling myself, when I was sick of being fat , I would do something about it. So I would lose 20-30 pounds and then gain it back. I went to my doctor asking for his help, asking what he thought of the lap band procedure. He told me it was a cop out and said I just needed to go to weight watcher like his wife did. Well thanks.. wish I had thought of that before.. oh wait, I had done weight watchers.. several times.

I studied the procedure for a LONG time. Read everything, the good , the bad and the ugly. For thoes of you who don't know, the lap band is a small ring that is put around the top part of the stomach making it very difficult to over eat, but its real purpose is to help to feel full longer and ultimatly to eat less and loes weight. It is not a cop out. It is still hard work. I will still need to choose my food wisely. Since I can only consume small amount of food, I have to pick the foods that have the most nutrition. I still have to exercise. It is no magic bullet. It takes a lot of courage.

I am a few days post op. I made it through about 3 weeks of nothing but liquids to prepare for the surgery. I am sore, but recovering well I think. Today was the first day I got to eat mushie foods. I prepared myself 1/2 cup of cottage cheese with a tablespoon of applesauce. I couldn't finish it, but it was great to actually eat something again.

I have not told very many people what I have done, until now. But I have been so inspired by other peoples blogs about their weight loss journey that I thought I would see if I could summons the guts to post my journey and share what I am learning with others.

I have had a few people tell me I was crazy, a few people tell me I wasn't big enough to consider weight loss surgery ( which is a whole other blog post in itself! ) But for the most part, the people closest to me have been very supportive. Especially my hubby who has picked up the slack for me while I haven't wanted to be in the kitchen as much. He is adopting many of the same eating habits I will be for his own health. He has always loved me no matter what the scale said but he is also my biggest cheerleader because he has seen how much I have struggled and knows how much I wanted to try this. I don't want to let him down.

So, here I go.. wish me luck!!

Time OUT

I just got home from a wonderful, albeit brief trip with my husband to Branson.
I didn't want to stay in just any place, so I hunted around until I found a lodge called White Lake Lodge. It is owned by a very nice couple. He has a fishing business where he takes people on trout fishing trips and she is a lovely retired 1st grade school teacher. The place is tucked back into the woods a bit, about 20 minutes outside Branson.
Our room was cozy and comfortable and romantic I think. We had a great view off the deck in the back overlooking Tablerock Lake.
Thursday morning I woke up to sun shining through the window and got up to grab my camera. I was sure it was going to be spactular. We looked through the widow and were suprised to find it was still mostly overcast and gray and foggy, but there was one little spot where the sun was shinning through the clouds and right through only our window.. at least that how it seemed to me. Here are a few shots I took. It really was beautiful. It was still and quiet and all you could hear were the birds and small critters rustling about.
I didn't get too many more pictures of our trip, but these were the ones that will remind me of my short but sweet little trip. I would like to go back again soon.. it was peace to my soul. I think we all need to take time out trips like that. We didn't go very far, it wasn't super fancy, but it was just enough to recharge, reconnect and miss my kids. I think we will plan another short trip like this in 6 months.

OH.. and least I should forget, on the way home we also stopped at Lamberts.. home of the THROWED ROLLS.. this is the place where they serve the most delicious rolls.. but only by air.. you have to catch them. While you are eating or waiting for your food, they come along with big bowls of fried potatoes or okra or some other ridiculously yummy naughty thing. Then you get your plate of food which was huge and perfect comfort food. My husband ordered their sweet potatoes that were heavenly. I am on a mission to find the recipe. The sweet waitress said they use cinnamon oil in them.. I am telling you, those potatoes WERE desert. So delicious.
I found a blog with a recipe for rolls that are as yummy as Lamberts.. Here is the link incase you would like to try them. And if anyone out there knows how to make those sweet potatoes.. I am BEGGING you.. please teach me!!


http://dineanddish.net/2010/03/mythical-balance-recipe-just-like-lamberts-throwed-rolls/comment-page-1/#comment-68441

If I actually get another blog done this week.. I am going to officially say I am blogging again.. I have a few more pillow case dresses to finish and then I will post picture. They turned out cute and were really easy!!
Till then!!

Here we go again!

I felt really embarrassed today when I told a friend I had a blog but realized it had been a year since I wrote anything! Then I realized WOW.. a whole year has gone by! I remember writing what I did.. and I remembered the personal struggles I was having and I am happy to report that I did make it through all those crazy things! I did find myself spiritually stronger, less judgmental and more grateful!

After enjoying a few blogs of other friends I had that same old pang of regret for not writing. It is good for the soul! It is good to kinda get things out there sometimes. After reading a few things this week I am so surprised to see just how much alike we all are. Us women in particular. Of the blogs I have read recently, the women were younger than me, way older than me, richer than me, brought up better than me, had more or less children than me, lived in nicer houses or not as comfortably as I do, had way different talents than me, were better or worse house keepers than me.. my point..and yes I do have one, is that no matter who we are, we all seem to have so many of the same struggles, hope, and desires regardless of where we came from.

So.. I feel inspired now.. I know, I know.. I have said it before.. but I really do want to keep up my blog better. Not for other people so much as for me. It is good to look back and see how I made it through things that seemed so hard. I am getting ready to go through new struggles. I found out this week that I am diabetic. It was not a complete suprise, but it was still kind of a shock to hear the doctor say the words. I am sure it will be a journey that will be a learning experience for me. I am not even sure what to say about it at this point.. but I have decided blogging about it will help me keep things in perspective..that is what I hope anyway!!

Gotta run for now. Need find some sugar free chocolate deserts!!